I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize