I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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