take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize