yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i wish my penis had a tongue
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
