it was like a zeppelin in a condom
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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