i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize