my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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