we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Welp...herpes.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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