You're so nebulous sometimes
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
