so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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