but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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