Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
