how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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