wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I am naked and annoyed.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
