if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
