apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize