i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
