Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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