He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
she woke up with a sticky ear
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
