You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
