SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
