We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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