Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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