what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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