is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
