have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize