Texts From Last Night

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  (913): View more from Kansas

  if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad

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  (913): if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad http://tfl.nu/tveg
  Replies (14) Good night (822) Bad night (2607)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  yeah i got into a fight with my man last night

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  why can't men just shut up and put out?

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  (860): he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep (860): yeah i got into a fight with my man last night (860): why can't men just shut up and put out? http://tfl.nu/05si
  Replies (60) Good night (2477) Bad night (2038)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis

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  (716): i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis http://tfl.nu/uywx
  Replies (19) Good night (4636) Bad night (647)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day

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  (913): I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day http://tfl.nu/fmap
  Replies (35) Good night (5083) Bad night (1806)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.

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  (518): I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room. http://tfl.nu/qe4u
  Replies (22) Good night (6781) Bad night (1140)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.

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  (312): dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it. http://tfl.nu/1896
  Replies (22) Good night (1034) Bad night (8452)
• Favorite

  (478): View more from Georgia

  So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking

  (404): View more from Georgia

  how did that work out?

  (478): View more from Georgia

  Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...

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  (478): So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking (404): how did that work out? (478): Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder... http://tfl.nu/o1yp
  Replies (15) Good night (5464) Bad night (1808)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.

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  (443): Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest. http://tfl.nu/68lv
  Replies (22) Good night (5556) Bad night (3434)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.

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  (506): oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier. http://tfl.nu/v0so
  Replies (2) Good night (2263) Bad night (1263)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.

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  (203): a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away. http://tfl.nu/13eg
  Replies (10) Good night (2289) Bad night (876)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka

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  (916): I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka http://tfl.nu/57f9
  Replies (1) Good night (1058) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts

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  (914): I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts http://tfl.nu/lyzo
  Replies (11) Good night (1045) Bad night (490)
• Favorite

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?

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  (662): Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you? http://tfl.nu/ngi1
  Replies (1) Good night (646) Bad night (377)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.

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  (913): I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise. http://tfl.nu/ymmb
  Replies (4) Good night (1255) Bad night (373)
• Favorite

  (731): View more from Tennessee

  It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.

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  (731): It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked. http://tfl.nu/thm4
  Replies (4) Good night (702) Bad night (295)

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