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• (443): View more from Maryland

  So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.

  (443): View more from Maryland

  It breaks. We fall.

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.

  (1-781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy

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• 

  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (218): View more from Minnesota

  I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.

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• (516): View more from New York

  Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...

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• 

  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

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• (+86): View more from China

  Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.

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• (904): View more from Florida

  I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.

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