Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
