I feel great
I just peed on a car
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
