he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize