Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
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