Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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