sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
