i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize