neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize