even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
