I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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