I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize