She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize