I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
