He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
