She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
