u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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