Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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