Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
