is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
