She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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