I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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