actually, I'm a sock model
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
