Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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